Chris Pine’s directorial debut, Poolman, is a lethal uninteresting flop that ranks as one of many worst directorial debuts in latest reminiscence.
PLOT: A spacey pool cleaner (Chris Pine) discovers a plot to steal water from Los Angeles throughout a drought.
REVIEW: (NOTE – POOLMAN WAS REVIEWED AT TIFF 2023) In the fourteen years I’ve been protecting TIFF, I’ve seen solely a handful of flicks that I’d say had been shockingly dangerous. The Mickey Rourke/ Megan Fox/ Bill Murray dud Passion Play involves thoughts. Poolman ranks with the worst films I’ve ever reviewed at JoBlo. It’s a stunningly unfunny comedian noir self-importance challenge for star Chris Pine, who additionally directed and co-wrote the movie. That it was made in any respect is a testomony to the ability of movie star, because it has already grow to be infamous on the competition for the quantity of walkouts going down on the screenings.
So why is Poolman so terrible? It comes all the way down to the screenplay and Pine’s grating lead efficiency as a type of “lovable” loser that’s clearly patterned on Jeff Bridges’s flip as The Dude in The Big Lebowski. Alas, Pine isn’t both of the Coen Bros, with the character unbearable proper from the beginning, as he cranks out each day letters to Erin Brokovich (a truth the film thinks is hilarious) and hooks up together with his aloof girlfriend, performed by Jennifer Jason Leigh, who’s sleeping with everybody else round him. He lives in an previous house complicated owned by Jack (Danny DeVito) and Diane (Annette Bening), who could or might not be his adopted dad and mom; the film by no means fairly makes up its thoughts.
His character, Darren, is obsessive about public transit in Los Angeles and attends weekly metropolis council conferences the place he tortures his metropolis councilman nemesis (Stephen Tobolowsky) together with his “wacky” displays. He is approached by a femme fatale (the beautiful DeWanda Wise) with a scoop that one thing shady could also be occurring with the native water provide, and earlier than you already know it, he’s popping Chinatown into the VHS and occurring his personal L.A odyssey.
A film like this lives and dies by its central character, and Pine is rarely convincing as a down-and-out hippie Poolman. He’s attempting to stretch past his main man consolation degree, and whereas his roguish attraction was humorous in Dungeons & Dragons, he’s not capable of make Darren something greater than a joke, and a nasty one at that. His makes an attempt at Coen Bros-type absurdist humour fall lethal flat, with two henchmen inexplicably dressed like Crocket and Tubbs in Miami Vice and Tobolowski’s Rabbi doing drag exhibits as one of many Golden Girls. You by no means spend money on the thriller as a result of Pine is nothing lower than grating within the lead position.
What’s particularly grating about Poolman is how self-satisfied it’s. Pine had constructed your entire film round himself, with not one of the supporting forged ever actually getting an opportunity to shine. None of them, not even the all the time dependable DeVito and Bening, make an impression, with solely Wise someway strolling away trying good as she fits the femme fatale position. Technically, the movie is impeccable, with Pine taking pictures the film on 35mm together with his Wonder Woman DP Matthew Jensen (Patty Jenkins is a producer). But as fairly because it seems, sitting via 100 minutes of Pine doing desperately unfunny schtick turns into a chore.
The truth is, TIFF audiences are notoriously variety to films. I’ve seen duds get bit rounds of applause, as we Canadians are respectful, regardless of how dangerous a film is. Yet, the thrill round TIFF following Poolman‘s premiere has been deadly (adding insult to injury, there was a big plan to screen this on 35mm on specifically created prints that never happened). Pine’s first movie landed with a thud, nevertheless it’s proof that comedy may be robust to tug off, even when tinged with drama. This desperately desires to be the subsequent Big Lebowski or Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, however it will be higher for all concerned if Poolman comes and goes with out a lot fuss.
