We’ve all heard the outrageous and hypothetical matchups between members of the animal kingdom. It often begins with certainly one of your pals getting a bit too inebriated earlier than they flip to you and ask, “Who do you think would win in a fight: 10 silverback gorillas or 1,000 rats?”
After taking a second to remind your self that this individual IS a wise and respectable human being, you resolve to humor them with a reputable reply. That turns into much more questions and that stirs up even additional debate.
Obviously the reply to the aforementioned query is the ten gorillas — and no, I cannot be accepting any counter arguments.
Now, let’s think about this exact same state of affairs however swap these animals with the mascots for every of the remaining 4 NFL groups taking part in on this weekend’s convention championship video games.
Also, by mascots, I imply the literal beings that they symbolize (not the folks in large furry costumes), so the Eagles are an actual eagle and the Bengals are a bonafide tiger. Cool, proper? I believed so.
Without additional ado, let’s get to the story of the tape.
NFC Championship: 49ers vs. Eagles
Fighter: Sourdough Sam, a miner from 1849 who trekked throughout the nation for the possibility to strike it wealthy in Northern California
Height: 5’8
Weight: 140 kilos
Weapon of selection: A rusty pickaxe that’s seen higher days
Vs.
Fighter: A bald eagle bursting on the seams with freedom
Height: 3 foot (6-foot-5 wingspan)
Weight: 14 kilos
Weapon of selection: Razor-sharp two-inch talons
Decision: Sourdough Sam by TKO
Ultimately, I consider this one finally ends up going to Sourdough Sam however not with out a formidable efficiency by the bald eagle.
In the 12 months 2023, the typical male is sort of a bit bigger than over 170 years in the past — they usually’d nonetheless seemingly be scared out of their minds on the sight of a bald eagle dive-bombing them from above. But these miners had been merely constructed completely different again then. Plus, he has a pickaxe.
I imply, these dudes would merely peace out from their households and WALK themselves all the way in which to the west coast for an extremely minuscule probability that they’d MAYBE discover some gold nuggets in a random riverbed. Most people this point in time get huge anxiousness about answering a telephone name! These prospectors took an unfathomable quantity of risks straight to the chest, which tells me they’d stand agency, pickaxe in hand, ready for the possibility to knock the eagle out of the sky with a well-timed swing.
But let’s stay awake on the eagle’s willpower. Just just like the NFL fan base he represents, this feathered pressure received’t be stored down by a couple of good wallops. As lengthy as he can nonetheless flap his wings, he’ll maintain coming and coming.
But ultimately, Sourdough Sam solely wants one good shot to erase the eagle’s benefit: Mobility. One efficient clip to the wing and it’s sport over.
AFC Championship: Bengals vs. Chiefs
Fighter: A behemoth Bengal tiger who has in all probability by no means recognized concern
Height: 10 foot (on their hind legs)
Weight: 500 kilos
Weapon of selection: Strength to crush a cranium in a single swipe
Vs.
Fighter: A grey wolf with immeasurable confidence to go at this alone
Height: 5’0 (on their hind legs)
Weight: 145 kilos
Weapon of selection: An overwhelming want to guard its territory
Decision: Bengal tiger in an amazing victory
I want I might make this one a bit extra attention-grabbing, however you need to assume this goes to the tiger in a landslide. The Bengal is sort of 4 occasions as heavy and twice the scale of the wolf, who usually would solely tackle such an opponent like this with its pack behind him. In this case, he’s flying solo.
One would possibly assume that the wolf’s smaller measurement signifies that’s he’s additionally extra cell and evasive. This really isn’t the case. A tiger can attain speeds as quick as 40 miles per hour, which is greater than sufficient to match, and even outpace, his enemy.
If you had been to Google the query, “How many wolves could take down a tiger?” you’d get a lot of solutions starting from 5 – 6 wolves to nicely over 15 to twenty. One remark thread concerning this very subject on Quora.com features a story from Siberia the place a single tiger was supposedly attacked by a whole wolf pack. The tiger killed 12 of the wolves and left the scuffle alive.
I went on to study that in locations the place each tigers and wolves co-exist, the tigers are literally at fault for killing wolves to close extinction!
If there was ever a lop-sided battle throughout the animal kingdom, that is it!