A few years in the past I revealed an article titled 30 Signs You May Have Taken Ultralight Backpacking too Far. It was a (largely) tongue-in-cheek tackle people who might have imbibed a bit of an excessive amount of on the UL Kool-Aid. After an prolonged on-line hiatus, adopted by some semi-serious sort posts, I believed it was time to revise and develop the lighthearted ultralight listicle. What follows consists of 25 of the unique indicators, together with 25 new ones.
Ultralight over 5,000m (16,404 ft) on Colombia’s unbelievable Cocuy Circuit (2015).
1. Not solely do you chop the top off your toothbrush, you trim the bristles as nicely.
2. You use a 1/8″ CCF mat (2 oz / 57 gr), even supposing 9 instances out of ten you get a shit sleep on it.
3. Speaking of the 1/8″ CCF mats, you initially bought one after being impressed by Gossamer Gear founder, Glen Van Peski, who has long-used the minimalist merchandise on his southern California backpacking journeys. What you could not know is that simply earlier than hitting the hay each night time, Glen takes a few Tylenol PMs earlier than drifting off to the soothing tones of Matthew McConaughey on the Calm app.
4. You don’t take a first-aid equipment of any description on a multi-day hike.
5. You give unsolicited gear recommendation to hikers with heavier packs than you. You are subsequently puzzled after they let you know to piss off.
6. You’ve acquired a poster of Ray Jardine – shirtless and carrying bike shorts – in your wall at dwelling. You additionally carry a passport-size model of the identical picture within the mini Ziploc bag which doubles as your pockets.
7. Speaking of Ray, you’ve spent the previous two months receiving physiotherapy in your decrease again since you stubbornly persevered in mimicking his “one-shoulder sling” fashion of backpacking whereas mountain climbing the Continental Divide Trail (Ed’s Note: All in good enjoyable, Ray. Still love ya; even the corn pasta……………not a lot the blood cleaner).
Ray Jardine – Author of the ultralight traditional, “The Pacific Crest Trail Hiker’s Handbook“, and its successors, “Beyond Backpacking” and “Trail Life.”
8. You insist on all the time going with a frameless backpack sans hip belt, even supposing you recurrently hike off-trail in rugged terrain, and carry greater than six days meals plus a few liters of water.
9. You skimp on guyline and tent pegs when tarp tenting to be able to save an oz. or two (Tip: The key to a taut tarp pitch is a good distribution of stress. Not really easy to attain with inadequate pegs, guyline, and guyout factors).
10. Speaking of tent pegs, you propose on carrying solely titanium shepherd hooks on subsequent 12 months’s journey to the Scottish Highlands.
11. When you acquired your Tarptent Aeon Li a few years in the past, you had been so upset that it got here in 0.8 ouncesover spec (i.e. lower than half a Snickers Bar), that you just critically thought of sending it again earlier than making an attempt it out within the discipline. Additionally, you thought of it a deal-breaker while you realized that you just couldn’t match the shelter horizontally into your backpack, which is form of like refusing to drink a wonderful Belgian beer since you don’t like the form of the bottle it is available in.
Tarptent Aeon Li and a crimson sundown on Italy’s Alta Via 2 (2019).
12. You routinely minimize the tags off new backpacking gear. Sometime later you ruefully understand that it could have been a good suggestion to notice the washing/storage directions beforehand.
13. Your go-to soaking vessel for no-cook meals is a Ziploc bag. There’s ultralight and there’s homeless.
14. You’ve begun referring to your self as a “fastpacker” – which is wanker-speak for somebody who thinks they’re a bit particular as a result of their pack is lighter, and so they cowl just a few extra miles than most different hikers.
15. When heading out for prolonged journeys within the backcountry (together with off-trail affairs), you by no means carry a navigational backup to the GPS app in your telephone (not even a compass/ABC watch, and an summary map). Come to consider it, your navigational information is such that you just suppose “triangulation” is one thing they educate in a arithmetic class in Bermuda, and “dead reckoning” is the identify of the most recent Stephen King novel.
Crossing the Salar de Uyuni with the Suunto M-2 compass (changed with Suunto M-3 Global in 2019) | Altiplano Traverse, Bolivia, 2017.
16. You’re contemplating changing your common shoelaces with dental floss.
17. You don’t carry any technique of water purification……..ever………not even mini-dropper bottle(s) stuffed with Aqua Mira or bleach.
18. You carry a pinch mild relatively than a regular-sized headlamp throughout shoulder season hikes.
19. On a number of backpacking journeys, you’ve discovered your self doing rapid-fire units of push-ups and sit-ups at 3 am, after going with a quilt that wasn’t heat sufficient for the circumstances you had been prone to encounter.
20. You had been so busy obsessing over your Lighterpack listing, that you just forgot (in ascending order of significance): A. Your wedding ceremony anniversary; B. Your child’s birthday; C. Your PCT begin date.
21. Speaking of Lighterpack, you’ve began mountain climbing in cargo shorts and shirts with massive pockets so you possibly can depend your telephone (alongside along with your buff, rain jacket, liner gloves, and the rest you possibly can stuff in) as worn weight in your gear listing. Bonus Point: After posting your Lighterpack on r/Ultralight, you interact in hours’ value of backwards and forwards making an attempt to justify your alternative, all of the whereas insisting that “…….it doesn’t really matter one way or the other, but……”
22. Not too way back you shelled out US$159 for a brand new Patagonia R1 Hoody, even supposing 90% of the time a $15-20 generic fleece will probably be simply as useful out within the boonies. (Ed’s Note: What I can let you know, I unexpectedly got here into some money).
Springer Mountain, GA – The southern terminus of the AT and the end of the 12 Long Walks. During my late fall/winter AT thru-hike (Oct 17 – Dec. 28, 2012), my insulation layers had been a combo of my first Patagonia R1 Hoody and the Montbell UL Down Jacket (since renamed the Superior).
23. You suppose {that a} backside pocket is a necessary function on a frameless backpack, relatively than only a handy technique to crunch up your Fritos.
24. When mountain climbing in areas which might be notorious for bugs (e.g. Fiordland (NZ), Alaska, Lapland, Canadian Rockies), you don’t carry a head-net (approx. weight = 1 oz) for weight-saving functions. This is often a one-off mistake.
25. Speaking of one-off choices, you lately swapped out your NeoAir sleeping mat for a sheet of bubble wrap.
26. You use a tarp that’s too small for you (e.g. 8′ x 5′ and also you’re greater than 6′ tall). You double down on the silly mild issue by not pairing your minimalist tarp with an UL bivy.
27. You carry two, relatively than three pairs of socks on multi-week backpacking journeys in chilly, moist, and muddy environments.
28. You don’t use gaiters when mountain climbing in desert environments to be able to save 1.3 oz.
29. You start every day by taking a look at your Instagram account, hoping that Ultralight Jerk has posted a brand new meme.
Stay tuned for a potential comeback within the new 12 months……….
30. You use a Thermarest UberLite. I’ve had Frog Toggs pants which have lasted longer than these mats. Indeed, simply final week a very gassy mountain climbing mate of mine swears he farted a gap by means of his UberLite after going a bit of too laborious on the Santa Fe beans and beef jerky.
31. Maltodextrin accounts for greater than 10% of your caloric consumption on long-distance hikes. If it does, you could need to take into account taking out dental insurance coverage.
32. You’re not planning to take an ice axe and microspikes for the Sierra part of the Pacific Crest Trail (in an above-average snow 12 months), reasoning that: “……my balance is good; a trekking pole will suffice.”
33. Speaking of the PCT, you’re contemplating not taking a rain jacket till you attain Washington (NOBO).
Hiking by means of an early June snowstorm within the High Sierra, when temps dropped right down to the low to mid-teens Fahrenheit (- 9 to – 12°C) / Pacific Crest Trail, 2007.
34. You recurrently end up hungry and thirsty whereas mountain climbing resulting from not carrying sufficient meals and water.
35. You bought a trekking pole tent after which determined to go away your trekking poles at dwelling in favor of discovering appropriately sized sticks alongside the path. You inadvertently doubled down while you later realized most of your hike was above treeline.
36. You suppose SUL and XUL is a few greater stage of backpacking nirvana when in actuality, 97% of the time they’re simply barometers utilized by gear nerds to brag about their base weight on-line after happening an in a single day journey in cherry-picked circumstances.
37. You moan and groan about condensation in your single-wall tent, which is form of like complaining about reliability points after buying a French automotive. Two issues to recollect about single-wall shelters: 1. A moist footbox isn’t the top of the world; 2. Condensation is like shit. It occurs.
38. You go stoveless on backing journeys the place sub-freezing temps are the norm (Ed’s Note: In my (meager) protection, generally the road between stoicism and absurdism might be blurry).
39. You get in your emotions when Ron Bell from Mountain Laurel Designs provides you a monosyllabic e-mail reply. In 15 years of fortunately utilizing MLD Gear and semi-regularly speaking with Ron, now we have by no means as soon as spoken on the telephone, and the longest e-mail I’ve ever acquired was perhaps three sentences lengthy (which admittedly felt like an “I love you”).
Carrying my long-time favourite frameless pack, the MLD Burn, on a mid-October hike of Austria’s Stubai High Trail (2019).
40. If your base weight is between six and eight kilos (2.7 – 3.6 kg) and also you’re nonetheless asking a bunch of on-line randos for shakedowns, likelihood is you’re simply fishing for consideration each for your self and/or an upcoming journey you’ve got deliberate.
41. You determined to save lots of a fifth of an oz. (5.6 gr) by not taking earplugs whereas mountain climbing hut-to-hut within the Alps.
42. You proceed carrying linerless working shorts with a 2″ seam, regardless of lately receiving 12 stitches above the attention courtesy of a prudish Girl Scout chief who you by accident flashed whereas filtering water. To your credit score, you haven’t filtered water because the unlucky incident.
43. You put on Altras in all varieties of circumstances, even supposing their sturdiness is questionable for something however manicured trails or comparatively mellow off-trail terrain.
Greg “Malto” Gressel’s beloved Altra Lone Peaks, held collectively by unshakeable hope, MacGyver-like ingenuity, and the sober realization that there have been no different choices.
44. Despite having a historical past of foot and decrease leg points, you insist on going with uber mild zero-drop footwear with minimal cushioning.
45. You spend extra time fascinated with gear weight, than all of the cool locations you may go mountain climbing.
46. To save an oz., you permit behind your bandana. Arguably the final word multi-purpose piece of mountain climbing gear, the standard bandana can be utilized as a towel, pre-filter, neck safety, pot cleaner, pot holder, tent drier (see #37), hanky, last-resort lavatory roll, face-covering throughout sand storms, and, for hold-ups if you happen to’re low on path funds and resolve to rob a comfort retailer.
7 Eleven mode
47. You’ve lately spent numerous hours researching quilt layering in anticipation of your upcoming winter mountain climbing journey to Costa Rica. ‘Tis the season.
48. You personal six totally different solar hoodies, even supposing you do all your mountain climbing in both the Pacific Northwest or the UK.
49. You use a fanny pack. That’s all I’ll say about that.
50. You’re in your fourth and final (?) Polartec Alpha Direct Hoody. You persevered by means of the primary three regardless of the fixed barbs out of your important different that you just appeared like a down-on-your-luck muppet. However, the ultimate straw got here when the sleeve of your Alpha garment ripped after you brushed in opposition to a home fern in your technique to the native clothes shop to select up a brand new pair of Altras and a patch equipment in your UberLite.
Related Posts
Disclosure: This publish comprises some affiliate hyperlinks, which suggests ‘The Hiking Life’ receives a small fee if you buy an merchandise after clicking on one of many hyperlinks. This comes at no extra price to the reader and helps to assist the web site in its persevering with aim to create high quality content material for backpackers and hikers.